


Sharing Beds Like Little Kids

by Thats_Amore



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Lorde Song, Childhood Friends, Coming Out, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff and Angst, Internalized Biphobia, Internalized Homophobia, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Minor Belgium/Romano (Hetalia), Mutual Pining, POV America (Hetalia), Sharing a Bed, Song: Ribs (Lorde), Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 10:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29807280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thats_Amore/pseuds/Thats_Amore
Summary: Alfred has known Savino since he was five years old, and he might have been in love with him the whole time. Growing up only made him realize it.
Relationships: America/South Italy (Hetalia)
Kudos: 15





	Sharing Beds Like Little Kids

**Author's Note:**

> The title and fic is inspired by the song "Ribs" by Lorde.

Alfred giggled as his best friend Savino led him up the staircase after almost everyone else had either fallen asleep in the living room or left his house as the party wound down to its inevitable conclusion. “Dude, your house is way more confusing in the dark.”

Savino huffed. “I think it’s more confusing because you’re drunk, idiota.”

“That might be it,” Alfred conceded. He glanced over at the wall, where a little six-year-old Vinny was scowling in his official school picture. Alfred could remember that day like it was yesterday, even if it was a decade ago. Vinny had just lost his two front teeth, and he had refused to smile for the photographer because he “didn’t want to look ugly.” Which was stupid as fuck. Savino was _gorgeous_. He couldn’t look ugly if he tried.

Savino smacked the back of his head. “Eyes forward, Fredo. I’m too wasted to drive you to the hospital if you trip and land on your ass.”

“Sorry.” He stared ahead for a few seconds, then snuck a side glance at Vinny’s profile when he was sure his best friend wouldn’t notice. Yep, just as gorgeous as ever. Alfred sighed pathetically. He was so gay, and so very, very screwed.

“What the hell are you sighing for?” Savino asked. He sounded irritated.

“Nothin’. I… just tired, I guess.” Alfred almost said it, almost said the three little words that would have made Vinny drop him on the staircase and refuse to drive him to the hospital. If he’d said what he’d been really thinking, Savino might not even bother to call an ambulance. But luckily, Alfred was just a little drunk. He wasn’t _wasted_.

Savi made a non-committal noise like he didn’t believe Alfred, but that was okay. As long as he never, ever, ever found out the truth, Alfred would be fine. He could totally deal with having his heart shatter inside his chest every time Savino hit on a girl, much less made out with one right in front of him, but he couldn’t deal with not having Savi around at all.

Eventually, they reached the top of the staircase. Alfred kept holding onto Savino for balance, even though he didn’t need that as much anymore. He liked holding onto his best friend, slinging an arm around his shoulder, and hugging him as much as he could get away with. Vinny just fit in his arms, the way nobody else ever had, and a stupid, incredibly gay part of Alfred didn’t feel complete when he wasn’t holding Savino.

There were more childhood pictures in the hallway. Vinny with his little brothers, Feli and Marcello. Alfred and his twin Matthew showed up in a few of them, and that made Alfred smile to himself. He was always going to be a part of Vinny’s life, even when he grew up and married some girl. He’d be his best man at the wedding, and he’d be in the photo albums Savino would show to his kids someday. Vinny would say, “This is me and my best friend, Fredo.” That would be enough, wouldn’t it? To be part of Savino’s life, even if he couldn’t be the person Savino chose to share his life with?

“We’re here,” Savino said. Alfred blinked, wondering why his eyes felt hot and things looked blurrier than normal. He wasn’t crying, was he? There was nothing to cry about.

“I didn’t know you’d be such a weepy drunk,” Savino muttered as he pushed open the door to his bedroom. “If I had, I would’ve made Gil stop giving you those hard lemonades sooner. You might not have been able to tell, but those things have a lot of vodka in ‘em.”

“I don’t mind. They were yummy. And I dunno why I was crying just now. It’s not like I’m sad about nothin.’” Nothing important, anyway.

Savino sighed in that familiar, “my best friend is being a moron” sort of way. “Sure you’re not,” he said. Vinny shut the door behind them, and the song from downstairs was muted. Alfred could only faintly hear the bass line thumping in time with his heart. Savino slid his arm away from Alfred’s back, and Alfred flopped down onto the mattress. “I’m gonna try to find a shirt for you to wear. You look like a gunshot victim right now.”

Alfred glanced down at his chest, where Savi had spilled a glass of red wine a few minutes ago.

He smiled up at his best friend with inebriated, infatuated glee. “Shot through the heart, and you’re to blame,” he sang, pointing at him. “Darlin’ you give love a bad name.”

Savino laughed and casually walked away like he hadn’t just made the most beautiful sound in the world. “I see we’ve moved onto the karaoke portion of the evening.” Savino started flipping through the hangers in his closet and Alfred shifted onto his side so he could stare at his back. Vinny had a nice back. A nice butt too, but Alfred probably wasn’t supposed to be looking at his butt. That was weird, and really gay, and Vinny would be grossed out if he knew Alfred had been staring at him like that.

Alfred buried his head in Savino’s pillow to avoid looking at him, but that didn’t help. Because the pillow was Savino’s, so it smelled like that fancy shampoo he used that made his hair look so shiny and soft. Was it weird to want to run your fingers through another guy’s hair? Probably about as weird as staring at another guy’s butt, Alfred concluded miserably.

Vinny made a grumbling noise that prompted Alfred to look up at him. “I don’t think anything in my closet is gonna fit you.”

Alfred grinned. “That’s ‘cause you’re so tiny, dude.”

Vinny whirled around to face him. His glare was probably supposed to be intimidating, but it was kind of adorable. The angry blush on his face was adorable too. “You asshole! I’m not tiny!”

“But you are. You’re like one of those candy bars you can get on Halloween, the fun-sized ones. I bet you’d fit right in my pocket.” Alfred laughed at the thought of a tiny, pocket-sized version of Savino cursing and yelling at him.

Savino growled and stomped over towards him. Before Alfred knew it, Savino was looming over him, and his hand was curled around the collar of his wine-splattered t-shirt. “If you weren’t my best friend, I’d kick the crap out of you right now.”

Alfred swallowed heavily. “I know you would.” The way Vinny could stand up for himself, even to guys who had several inches on him, was kind of hot. The tight grip he had on his t-shirt was sexy too. Savino was so close he could have kissed Alfred if he just leaned down a little, and his proximity made Alfred’s brain fuzzy and made it hard for him to remember that Savino was annoyed at him. The stupid, gay part of Alfred’s mind was starting to take over, and all that part wanted for Vinny to straddle his lap and pin him down to the mattress. Fuck, that would be… everything.

Abruptly, Savino let go of Alfred’s shirt, straightened up, and cleared his throat. “I… I should go find you something to wear. Maybe from Nonno’s closet.”

Alfred smiled like his heart wasn’t breaking. Vinny couldn’t even look at him, probably because he had seen how much Alfred wanted him, in ways guy friends weren’t supposed to want each other. “Sounds like a plan. I’ll sit here and wait for you to get back.”

Savino gave him a troubled look before he left, and he shut the door a bit more softly than he normally would. Alfred sighed and kicked his shoes off.

“You’ve gotta quit being so gay,” he reminded himself. “Or else Vinny is gonna notice.” And then Vinny wouldn’t want anything to do with him anymore. Alfred couldn’t let that happen.

He stretched out on Savino’s bed and stared up at the ceiling. He’d been in Vinny’s bed before, but that had been a long time ago, back when they were little kids and it wasn’t strange for them to share a bed. Mattie was usually there too, and so was Feli, so it was completely innocent, completely _normal_.

Alfred idly wondered when exactly it had stopped being innocent. At one point, he was sure, he must’ve regarded Savino with the normal level of affection any boy would hold for his best friend. There were other feelings that developed later with puberty, but as far back as he could remember, Vinny had always been special to him, always made him smile a little too much. He could remember late nights spent in this bed just talking to his best friends, laughing until his ribs got sore. He hadn’t laughed like that in a long time.

But then there were the mornings. Mornings where he was squished in between Mattie and Vinny, but Vinny was always the one he’d be holding onto. Vinny, still asleep, breathing into his neck while Alfred woke up but didn’t dare to move, only smiling at the ceiling and enjoying the confusing but not unpleasant fluttery sensation in his tummy. Because even as a little kid, he liked holding onto Vinny more than a normal best friend should. But back then he didn’t know that it was butterflies, that it was gay, that it was _weird_ and _wrong_. 

Tears started to fill up his eyes, and God, Alfred hated himself. Now he was not only gay, but a stupid, pathetic crybaby _pansy_. Vinny was a nicer guy than his cursing would suggest, but he wouldn’t want to be best friends with someone like that. No one would.

He took off his glasses and tried to wipe his eyes clean before Savino returned, but while he was trying to force himself to stop crying, Savino entered the room, holding a shirt on a hanger. “Jesus Christ. What the fuck happened while I was gone?”

“Nothing. I’m just a weepy drunk, like you said.” Alfred put his glasses back on his face.

Savi quirked an eyebrow skeptically as he passed the shirt over. “You sure that’s it?”

“I was just thinking about stuff,” Alfred explained vaguely. “Sometimes, I feel really old. It was easier when we were little kids, you know?”

“You’re only sixteen. That’s not exactly old, Alfredo. But I know what you mean. Things were easier back then.”

Alfred pulled off his t-shirt and took the one Savino handed him off the hanger. “So much has changed since I first met you.”

“Yeah… you definitely weren’t that buff when you were five.”

Alfred glanced up and noticed that Vinny’s gaze was a little unfocused. And was he blushing? Nah, that was crazy. Vinny was straight. He wouldn’t be blushing when he looked at Alfred.

Alfred shrugged on Vinny’s grandfather’s old t-shirt, which hung a little loose on his frame. “Football, I guess. But I’m not as buff as some of the guys on the team. I don’t have a six-pack.” He poked at his own abdomen, which had a small layer of fat over it, and frowned. Maybe he should cut back on the cheeseburgers.

Savino rolled his eyes as he sat down next to him. “Your stomach’s fine, idiota. You don’t need a six-pack to be attractive.”

Alfred laughed. “How would you know? You like girls. You definitely seemed to like Emma when you were shoving your tongue down her throat earlier.” And wow, Alfred totally didn’t sound bitter and jealous at all.

But Savino didn’t seem to notice how jealous Alfred was about Vinny making out with a girl. His gaze was fixed on his hands like they were the most fascinating thing he’d ever seen. “Alfred, I…” Alfred stiffened, suddenly alert. Savino hardly ever called him Alfred. It was usually Alfredo or Fredo, sometimes idiota or another insult he said in a fond tone. “You’re right. I _do_ like girls. But I don’t _just_ like girls.” Savi looked up, anxiety written all over his face. “You get what I’m saying, right?”

Alfred nodded, though he was still dumbfounded and processing the news. He was too inebriated to understand things at a normal speed, but he was also surprised. Vinny was bi? “Yeah. I’m sorry for assuming before. I didn’t know.”

Savi smiled, but it didn’t meet his eyes. “It’s okay.”

“Did I… did I do something? To make you feel like you couldn’t tell me? Because if I did, I’m sorry. I’d never want to make you feel like you couldn’t tell me something about yourself.” God, if Alfred had made Savino feel _afraid_ of him, he would never forgive himself.

“It wasn’t anything you did. It was just easier not to tell you. That way I wouldn’t have to deal with it myself, and I wouldn’t have to deal with whatever your reaction might be.”

Alfred understood that. It wasn’t so much that Savino had given him any reason to think he’d hate someone for being gay, or whatever the hell it was when you got fixated on your best friend, who just happened to be another guy. But Alfred hadn’t gotten past hating himself for how he felt, and he couldn’t take the possibility that Vinny might hate him too.

He put his arms around Savi to let him know it was okay. “We’re still best friends, Vinny. Always will be. I don’t care who you’re into.” Well, he did care a little, but not the way Vinny was worried he did. A tiny part of him was happy he might have a chance, but Alfred was trying to ignore that. Vinny coming out as bi wasn’t about him.

Savino chuckled and returned the embrace. “That’s good to know.” He sounded much more relaxed now.

Alfred felt more relaxed too. Holding Savino felt just as right as it always did. He closed his eyes and inhaled the same warm, vaguely citrusy scent he’d picked up from Savino’s pillow. “You smell really good.”

Vinny snorted. “You smell like hamburgers and too much Axe body spray.”

“Hey!” Alfred pulled away to pout, but it was really difficult when Savino was laughing so hard at the fake-offended look on his face. Damn, his laugh was beautiful. Everything about him was beautiful. “And to think, I was gonna invite you to lie down with me.”

Savi snorted. “You were gonna invite me to lie down in my own bed?”

“An invitation’s an invitation. Take it or leave it.” Alfred took his glasses off and set them down on the night stand before flopping over onto his side. Savi gave him a baffled look as he took off his shoes; then he lay down facing him. Vinny’s bed was fairly small, so he was only a few inches away, but that was a few inches too much, in Alfred’s estimation.

Alfred pulled his best friend towards him, until their bodies were pressed together, just like when they were little kids crammed together with their brothers on this exact same bed. “You don’t have to stay so distant. It’s not like I’ve got cooties.”

“I don’t think you have cooties, dumbass. I just wasn’t expecting you to want to _cuddle_ me.” He paused, but his body went tense, so Alfred figured he should wait and listen to what Vinny had to say. “Isn’t some part of you worried I might be enjoying this too much?” he asked quietly, like he didn’t really want Alfred to hear the question.

Alfred’s heart felt like it was about to beat right out of his chest. He wondered if Savino could hear it. “That’s, um… not something I was worried about.” He wanted Savino to enjoy this too much, the way he was enjoying this too much. He wanted Savi to like being held by Alfred as much as Alfred liked holding him.

Savino let out a relieved exhale and snuggled closer. His head was tucked right under Alfred’s chin, and now his arm was draped loosely over Alfred’s side. “Good. I’m glad I didn’t make things weird.”

Alfred hesitated, biting his lip to keep the words in. They were so comfortable right now, and Savi was glad things weren’t weird between them. What Alfred had to say could make things irretrievably weird and uncomfortable, but he couldn’t ignore the miniscule possibility that it might make things even better.

The feeling, and the words that went along with it, burned Alfred’s throat and chest. It was too much, too big to stay contained inside himself. He released his teeth from his lower lip.

“Vinny, I’ve gotta tell you something.”

Savino shifted his head up to gaze into his eyes. “What is it?”

Alfred gulped nervously, but forced the words out. “I don’t like girls.” Savino’s eyes widened, but Alfred continued before he could react verbally. “I don’t like guys either, generally speaking.”

Savino rubbed gentle circles over the middle of his back. “Are you asexual, Fredo? Is that what you’re trying to tell me?”

Alfred shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut so he wouldn’t have to see Vinny’s reaction. He was terrified, even if he had less reason to be terrified than he was before Savino came out to him. “Close, but, uh… not quite. I’m not sure what the word for this is, but I like you. _Only you._ I think I’ve always liked you, and I probably always will.” He tightened his hold on Savino, scared he’d try to run away, that he’d crush Alfred’s heart by telling him he couldn’t ever feel the same way.

Savino’s hand stilled on the middle of his back, and Alfred waited for those terrible words to come. He felt Vinny’s hand leaving his back, and he was sure he would hear them any second now. But then that same hand was gently cupping his face, brushing away a tear that had leaked from Alfred’s eye.

“Tesoro, it’s okay. Will you please look at me?”

Alfred blinked his eyes open, and it must have been the alcohol or an exhaustion-induced hallucination. Because he could swear that Savino was _smiling_ at him. That would explain the whole “tesoro” thing too. Vinny had never called him that before.

“You aren’t mad at me for making things weird?”

Savino grinned. “Hardly. The, uh, exact opposite actually.” His cheeks turned a little redder, and there was a light in his hazel eyes that seemed almost shy, and everything about Vinny’s reaction was a complex puzzle Alfred couldn’t understand. Until, suddenly, he did.

“Oh. Ohhhhhh.”

Savino laughed. “I love you so much, idiota.”

Alfred beamed at him. “I love you too.”

Savino leaned up to kiss him, and Alfred closed his eyes and managed to control his glee long enough to kiss him back. His breath tasted like the wine he’d been drinking earlier, and Alfred never wanted to taste anything else for the rest of his life. His hands felt oddly light as they greedily roamed over Vinny’s back, and Vinny was the one tether keeping Alfred connected to Earth. When Savino’s tongue slipped into his mouth, a deep, desperate moan tore from the back of Alfred’s throat, from the very center of his soul, as if to say, _yes, thank you, please, more, more._

Savino lingered for a while longer, until both their breaths grew short in their lungs and they were at serious risk of passing out if they kissed any longer. When he withdrew, Alfred let out a soft, needy whine of protest. Alfred opened his eyes, and Savino was smirking at him with lips shiny from Alfred’s saliva.

“That good, huh?”

“I wish we didn’t have to worry about breathing. I could’ve done that forever.”

“Me too.” Vinny kissed him on the lips again, just a simple, quick peck this time, and shifted his head down to nuzzle his neck.

Alfred drowsily began petting Vinny’s hair, which turned out to be just as soft as it looked. “Can you just kiss me from now on? It sucked seeing you kiss Emma earlier, and that was before I knew what it was like. I don’t think I’d be able to stand seeing you kiss someone else now.”

Vinny sighed at the reminder. “Yeah, I’ll talk to her tomorrow. I don’t think she has serious feelings for me, but I’ll make sure she understands that nothing else is gonna happen between us.” He placed a soft, sweet kiss against the base of Alfred’s throat. “You’re the only one I wanna be kissing, Fredo.”

Alfred smiled contently. “That’s good. I’m glad I get to be selfish and keep your amazing kisses all to myself.”

He could feel Savino laughing into his neck. “Ti amo, you selfish bastard.”

“I love you too.”

Savino didn’t say anything else, and a couple minutes later he must’ve fallen asleep. Alfred could feel soft little puffs of air against his neck, just like he could those mornings as a little kid, when he woke up before Savino did.

Just like when he was a little kid, Alfred kept himself still and smiled at the ceiling, enjoying the fluttering sensation in his stomach. Except that now he knew that it was gay, that it went beyond what most guys felt for their best friends, but that didn’t mean that it was wrong. Alfred didn’t dare to move, not because he was afraid Vinny would leave when he woke up, but because there was nowhere else in the world he would rather be.


End file.
